MILF

As I am preparing to move (hopefully) within the next couple of weeks, I've been going through some of my old belongings in an effort to decide what comes along and what gets trashed.  Finding an old box of photo albums (you know, back from when we actually had them developed...), I couldn't help but laugh when I came across some from a visit with my nephew and sister many years ago.


I believe my nephew was three or four at the time, and like most children I encounter, he gravitated toward me.  It's easy being an aunt and not a mother because I have always been able to spoil him rotten and not have to discipline him.  At the time of this particular visit, my sister Tracy was single, and my nephew was an only child.


One particularly hot summer afternoon, my sister, our grandmother, my nephew and myself went to Target.  I no longer know the reason for our visit to this popular retail chain, and even if I could recall, it's irrelevant.  After paying for my purchases and waiting for my sister to do the same, I began to walk with my nephew toward the door.


Being the fun aunt that I am, I decided to teach him how to walk keeping his feet inside each of the square tiles and told him that if he stepped on a crack, he'd break his mother's back.  Very carefully, the two of us walked across the spacious front-end of the store to the doors, determined not to step on any cracks.  I knew he'd never forgive himself if he broke my sister's back.


As we walked hand-in-hand playing our game, I could hear my sister say behind us, "Aunt Freeway is such a MILF!".


"Me too, Mommy!  Me too!"  Exclaimed his little voice.


We tried to convince him that no, he was not a MILF, but he insisted he was.  My sister, grandmother, and I laughed hysterically at this insistence.  All I could say to him was, "Someday when you're old enough to understand what you just said, I'm going to tell you this story and embarrass you".  He's nine now.


I'm trying to determine if he's old enough to hear this story...and whether or not he'll understand it.  He probably has never heard of the original American Pie movie that this saying became popular from, and I think my sister might kill me if I show it to him.


Taking votes,
Freeway Fairington


PS-I hope you all know what a MILF is.  If not, please look it up: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/MILF (Btw, this blog refers to the FIRST meaning!)